My husband Eric’s biological dad has never been in his life. His stepdad was in his life from about ages 2-17, but sadly, he said the only thing he really remembers about his step-dad is that he used to sit at the breakfast table in his bathrobe and never looked up when he entered the room. That crushes me because I remember reading a few years ago that Oprah had a moment in the 1990’s where she figured out one of her greatest life lessons was “that everybody just wants to be appreciated or validated.” She then had an aha! moment in 2000 when Toni Morrison, author of The Bluest Eye, was on the show asking, “Does your face light up [when you see children]?” because that allows your face to speak how your heart feels.
Ever since I heard that, I’ve made a concerted effort to always look happy and thrilled when my children and/or husband walk into the room. I do that because I always felt loved by my parents and that feeling is wonderful. To think that my husband never got this from his dad breaks my heart. But despite not having a true father in his life and not having the love from a father, he is a pretty darn AHHHH-mazing father (AND husband)! And at 15 years old, God thankfully put a wonderful person in Eric’s life, his best friend Chris (who was best man at our wedding). I think Eric has always looked up to Chris although they are only one year apart. Who says your male influence has to be your own father, right?
Just so you can keep up… I was married before Eric. We had my now 12-year-old Lily and divorced before she was two. It was sad and heart-breaking but somehow we all figured out how to make post-divorce life work. So much so, I wrote about what divorce looks like in our house here on the blog. Years ago, Lily’s dad moved to Los Angeles and he has been VERY supportive of Eric being a major part of her life and he and Eric get along great! I know, kinda crazy right?!
Eric could have run the other way when we met. I mean goodness gracious, I got Breast Cancer less than a year after we met. But, he didn’t. He fell in love with me AND my daughter, who is now also his daughter. He loves both our girls exactly the same and I know they love him with all of their hearts. We are his world and he is ours. This man goes out of his way to take care of his girls too. He loves on them, disciplines them, takes them on Daddy/Daughter dates, and wants to create memories for them all while building his successful business My Smart Shirt. Eric just gets it.
Why am I telling you this? Because good people deserve to be recognized. Good men should be recognized too! Plus he deserves to be recognized on a random day that is not Father’s Day so I am doing that today. I read a devotional a few years ago by my old Pastor Andy Stanley’s wife, Sandra Stanley called Comparison Trap. In her book, it said that you should, “Celebrate others out loud and on purpose.” So doesn’t it just make sense that we should do that for ALL of the people we love?! No matter how big or small their accomplishments?
CELEBRATE OTHERS OUT LOUD AND ON PURPOSE! I love it and I love him!